Rising Up From The Ashes

A long time ago, well okay maybe just 16 months or so – with my life being as chaotic as it has been lately it seems much longer – I wrote a blog about Connections. About interacting with the other people in our lives.

It earned me a couple new subscriptions, and more importantly, a few new friends. In it, I talked about honesty and my belief that without it, all relationships are superficial, phony and only destined to leave us unhappy since we are not even being true to ourselves. Now I certainly do not expect everyone who has wandered in here to have read that. And I will be the first to admit that my initial response to a person who is being honest with me has not always been welcoming and fun but I do think the relationship has ended up stronger in the long run because of it.

So, what the hell is it that has lead not one but two different people that I know in the "community" today to approach me with the intention to join them in deceit???

This morning one of my married Domme "friends" let me know that she has a man she has been fooling around with online. Apparently he now has the opportunity to travel here to the Twin Cities for business and she wants me to be her cover with her husband while she sneaks off to spend a couple days at this guy’s hotel. What the fuck? Really? She claims it will make us good friends. Why the hell would I want to be "good friends" with someone who would cheat and lie like that? At least offer me cash.

Then, already pissy about that, on top of my naturally distrustful nature, I hear from one of the male tops in the same "community." He proceeds to let me know that he appreciates how discrete I can be because he wants me to force him to crossdress. (it seems one of the men I know in ’real life’ mentioned how grateful he was that I have not outed him and his preference for dressing as a female to all of his drinking buddies) This man has even gone so far as to pick out all the items I am supposed to make him wear but we have to meet somewhere private so that his wife, who is also his submissive, does not find out. When I remind him that I only play with my pet, he tells me that he will keep my secret in return for keeping his. Again, WTF? I have no real desire to force someone to crossdress and if I did, my pet and I would deal with that within our relationship. I wouldn’t go sneaking about to do it with someone I barely know. And yes, I realize there are all sorts of power dynamic issues that come up when someone who identifies as a Dom decides he wants to experiment with some submissive roles but what the hell are you doing married to someone if you aren’t willing to confront that shit together and would rather lie to them???

Arrrrggggghhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Have I mentioned lately how much I think people suck? Or that I wonder why we bother with relationships at all?

I say stock up on sex toys and save yourself a lot of hassle and heartbreak.